


Palliative

by SoggyPosterior



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, Implied abuse, Implied self hatred, M/M, This is more of a bad than a good tbh, This is my first fic ever pls dony hurt me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-23
Updated: 2016-04-23
Packaged: 2018-06-04 01:39:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6635800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoggyPosterior/pseuds/SoggyPosterior
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>pal·li·a·tive<br/>adjective<br/>(of a treatment or medicine) relieving pain or alleviating a problem without dealing with the underlying cause.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Palliative

You knew this was just palliative. Flushed against each other, calling each other's names. You knew it would only solve your issues for now, and someday they would come back roaring in your ears and shocking you like a storm, but you couldn't bring yourself to end this.

Though you both claimed it was for relief, and nothing more, you both had always been bad at deception. He had his own issues to let out, his own aggressions to the universe for making him a mistake, for making him ‘a mutated fuck with a destiny of only ever becoming a cancerous tumor to destroy any chance of success and happiness everyone has.’ 

You too had your issues. Bruises from battles that would never disappear emotionally, and an unabashed fear of the shadows. You’d flinch if someone snuck up on you, and maybe even get defensive if you were startled too badly. You never felt safe, and always felt watched.

It was him and his whole being that made you feel whole and safe, though. With him the shadows were just shadows- not an audience. And fuck, you knew, that burried deep in him, his claws branding your back, you made him feel a little less like a mistake, and a little bit more like ‘a happy accident,’ as Bob Ross would put it. But even knowing this, you were too afraid to tell him you loved him, that you needed him, for fear that he would push you away, and that you’d lose this, and that you’d lose him.

So for now, as long as things would be okay for even just a short time, you could deal with being palliative.

**Author's Note:**

> This is actually my first ever published fic? I'd appreciate feedback I guess??? I'm sorry for this angsty short bs.


End file.
